Oh Jaylee how I love you...

Jaylee cracks me up!!  Seriously that girl kills me!!  While some days, by 9am I am ready to sell her(don't worry it's just a saying I would never!!) most days, I just laugh with her!!  You see Jaylee thinks she is hysterical, so most of the time, she will begin laughing before anyone else can!!  I'm going to try to be better about writing some of these moments down!!
So today, she wakes up early and goes and puts on a movie while Kynna and I are "sleeping".  (Not that I can ever actually sleep with her awake, since she like my brother Kevin, thinks that if they are awake everyone else should be as well!!)  Well she finds my phone and I hear her calling people.  Well Jaylee only likes to talk on the phone when it's on her terms and she keeps it on speaker phone, which is kind of nice because I can hear the conversations as well.  So it's 7:30 and she's calling my mom in Arizona.  They chat for a little bit and then I'm not sure why but my mom is singing the Mean Old Witch song.  Well as some of you know at the end the song says, "I'm a mean old witch with a hat. BOO!!"  And then my dear Jaylee says to Grammy-"It didn't work!!  You didn't scare me Grammy!!"  And then she hangs up on her!!  Not sure if I missed something, but next thing I know she's telling Grammy bye and that she loves her!!  At least she still loves her after her failed attempt to "scare" her!!
Then later on today we were chatting with Aunt Say, and we were talking about Sunday dinner at Grammy and Grandpa's house and Say was inviting us.  Well we are going for Christmas, and Jaylee is very aware of this and makes sure to let everyone know, and she informs Aunt Say that she can't come because she's going to be "sick" so she doesn't have to come tomorrow "but don't worry Aunt Say I'll be there for Christmas!!"  I guess she doesn't want to go and is already using the excuse of being sick!!

Oh I LOVE you Jaylee-Bug!!

Just more Rantings from me...

You know every year around this time, I swear that things will be different!!  That I will handle my emotions a little better then last year!!  Well I guess for the first time, I actually did!!  But not necessarily for the best!!  Most of you reading this, know that I lost 2, yes 2, brothers in a car accident many years ago, on a dark crisp night.  My parents had a rule that if you weren't home on time, they would come looking for us.  So it was my parents that found and called 911 after the truck they were driving, went off a 75 foot embankment.  They had been coming home from the Homecoming football game and dance.  I was 12 years old!!  So needless to say, my life has changed a LOT since that night 18 years ago.  Jared was 14 and Brian was 17, when they were killed, so this is the first year, that both of them have been gone longer then they were here on earth.  Kind of a weird thought!!  I often find myself wondering (just for a moment) what they would be like today.  I'm curious and love all of my siblings so much!!  I've always tried to put off the tears and pain that comes with this loss!!  And while I know that this happened MANY years ago, and I know that they are in a better place, I'm still a little selfish and would rather not have to deal with the pains associated with death.  The last couple of years have been super crazy for our family, not just for Brady and I, but my entire family, especially with the loss of my uncle, grandpa and cousin in less then a month.  I've had a few friends and people I know very well, deal with death of either a child, a family member, and even with some themselves, here lately, and my heart always feels so much for their families, since I mostly know what's in store for each of them in the coming days, months and even years!!
So my change this year- well I wouldn't say that I handled things better this year.  Just different!!  I woke up the other morning, seriously in the WORST mood ever, and while I have a super understanding husband, I can't say the same for my little girls that seemed to be getting the brunt of this mood.  J made a comment to me about being grouchy, and I just hugged her!!  And in that moment, my heart broke!!  Not for me, but for my parents!!  I know how much I LOVE my beautiful little girls, and so I thought of loosing one of them, let alone both, and I just can't even wrap my head around that pain completely, nor do I ever want to!!  I've known forever, that I have been blessed with the most amazing parents ever, but in this moment, I was just in awe as to how blessed I truly am!!  My Dad can fix anything, and just has so much knowledge.  He is super athletic, very honest and kind and just a strong man both mentally and physically.  But this bear also has a super tender spot, especially for his kids and even more for his grandkids!!  While he taught me how to work hard, he also taught me how to be kind and gentle, and honest in everything that I do!!  And then there's my Mom!!  She is one of my best friends!!  She is outgoing, generous, loving, hilariously funny, so talented and so many more things that I want to be!!  She is seriously the most amazing lady that I have ever met!!  And lucky me, gets to call them Mom and Dad!!  And my kids get to call them Grammy and Grandpa (unless J is calling them another name that day)!!  I believe it takes a super strong person to loose a child, and I guess these 2 super strong people must be even more amazing then I've ever even thought!!  I guess all I can say to them, is Thank you and I love you both so much!!!
There are major benefits to having kids!!  They give you a whole new insight on sooooo many things!!  Anyways, I have to change the subject from talking about my parents, they make me cry to much and I HATE to cry!!  How in the world I married into the Bouwhuis family is beyond me!!  They are all criers and they don't mind it at all!!  My husband calls it refreshing,  I call it annoying!!  I despise it because I hate that my makeup runs down my face, that I can't hardly talk let alone to a point where anyone can understand me!!  It's just not for me!!  Anyways, so tomorrow(I guess it is now) as we remember these 2 brothers, my heart and prayers will be especially with my parents!!  I'll be a good girl and go to church and you can more then bet, that I will be thanking my Heavenly Father for these amazing parents and each and every one of my siblings!!  I really am a lucky girl to be blessed with the family that I have!!  But even more, I'll make sure to give my adorable girls some extra loving and just count my blessings that they are part of my family and that I get to be their mommy!!  And honestly, I feel blessed that I got to know my brothers!!  That I got to spend time with them!!  Heck I bet there wouldn't have been a Jaylee if I hadn't!!  (The Jay part came from Jared, who's nickname was Jay.)

Things I dislike...

Well I'm going to ramble for a moment, since I'm just in that kind of mood!!  It has been super crazy around here lately!!
#1-Not having a camera~We watched our nephew for a few days, and it was nice to have him with us and feel like what it would be like with twins!!  I really wouldn't mind and as much as those 2 one year olds got into, it really was fun!!  I totally am sad that my cameras are not working at the moment.  I have no idea what happened!!  My new one hasn't been working since Bear Lake, and my old one which I switched back to after the other died, is now not taking pictures!! I am dying without a camera!!  I got these onesies from Huggies that I was going to put them in and take pictures, because I thought it would be funny, but of course that never happened!!  Guess what I'm asking for my birthday or Christmas!!  I don't know if I'll be able to make it that long without one though!!  I am a pictureaholic!!!  How do people live without a camera at their fingertips?!!  I guess most people use their phones nowadays, but the camera on my phone, sucks!!!
#2-Funerals especially around this time of year~I had a friend from my old singles ward, die this past week.  Super sad and totally unexpected!!  I am the type of person that because of all of the many deaths I have dealt with in my life, I feel like it's the right thing to do by going to a friends funeral.  However because of said deaths, I hate them around the change of seasons time, mostly because no matter what they always seem to take me back to that October day 1993!!  I know, that was a LONG time ago, but you never really forget moments like that!!  Now add in to the equation, little kids because it seemed like everyone had something going on or was out of town, and it's a joy-NOT!!  Thank goodness for good friends who were right there ready and willing to help!!  Which takes me to my next dislike...
#3-Open caskets~ I typically don't mind seeing the body, except when they don't look the same as I remember them!!  I like to remember people by the good times we had, and not the bad that ultimately took their life.  Well this dear, sweet friend had been through a LOT and she looked like it!!  I have tried so hard to get that image out of my head and remember her as a fun, loving person that I knew her as, and it has been hard!!  I wasn't prepared for that and usually in that type of situation, I wouldn't go through the line, but in the moment I got talking to old friends and the next thing I knew, the friend in front of me turned around and told me she looked rough, but it was to late and I was already there in front of her!!  Lucky for me, Jaylee was over on one of the couches, and MaKynna was buckled in the stroller and couldn't seen anything!!  All and all, I was glad that I was able to be there, kids and all!!
#4-The fact that my dear Husband doesn't like Pumpkin~How in the world do you not like pumpkin!!  It's not just him, it's most if not all of his family as well!!  I love pumpkin pie, pumpkin chocolate chip cookies, pumpkin rolls, pretty much anything pumpkin, however at this wonderful fall time of year, I don't really get to enjoy these wonderful pumpkiny treats since he doesn't like them!!  Oh well I suppose there are worse things in life, right now I can't think of any, but I'm sure they exist!!
Really that was all I suppose!!  I really can't complain!!  Things are going really well with our little family, and hopefully some good changes are headed our way!!

I LOVE this time of year!!!

Guess what I've been looking at!!  All I can say is my sister-in-law is WONDERFUL!!  We had these taken kind of early for us this year!!  We wanted to beat the bad weather that it always seems like we are fighting with.  Last year I think we changed the date for pictures 2 or 3 times because of bad weather!!  Not this time!!    Considering that Jaylee just wanted to play with her cousins, Kynna just wanted food, Brady managed to get mud on his white shirt before we were finished, and I managed to buy a shirt and use it without ever trying it on(in my defense I have the exact same shirt in blue and tried it on and it fits just fine) good thing I was wearing a white undershirt, they turned out cute!!  I seriously almost just called it quits but they really did turn out great!!!  We wanted to go with something a little less dressy this year since our last few years have been way dressy!!  Brady seemed to like it this way a lot better, and we all seemed a little more us!!  Next year I promised Brady we would do a boy color scheme like blue or green!!  We'll see though!!  Anyways, these are just a couple I copied from the file, but they don't really turn out on my screen right but when I uploaded them to the online site I use, they seemed to adjust the size and picture a little!!  I'll wait for the real copy of pictures to have a ball with!!  I guess it's time to get Christmas cards going!!!

Jaylee's 1st Primary Program

It's that time of year once again, when the Primary kids are doing their Sacrament Programs, and Jaylee had her very 1st one this last Sunday!!  We had put the songs for the program on her MP3 player and let her listen to them so she knew them REALLY well.  I also made a CD for her that we would listen to in the car, since I needed to know them as well.  Needless to say, she was super prepared for this program!!  Jaylee LOVES to sing, and when she knows a song, she loves to sing really LOUD!!!  So we go to the practice our ward had on Friday, only to learn that Jaylee who is 4, was put on the 3rd row back.  She was on the 2nd which wouldn't have been a big problem, at least she would have been seen a little, but then they moved her back.  Well I told them on Friday that you can't even see her and she really needs to be moved up.  Well they hummed and hawed over the fact and made the comment that they don't want her to overpower the other little kids on the front row, but I just kept telling them, but she's 4 and little.  So they tell me that they are going to move her up and switch spots with one of the 6 year olds.  So imagine my surprise on Sunday to find that while yes they did move her, they moved her over one seat so now there was no way at all to see her since she was now right behind the pulpit.  The pulpit with the microphone, which would really pick up her singing!! WHAT?  I was so mad.  Maybe it shouldn't have bothered me as much, but come on!!  You have all of the other little kids in the front, so their parents and grandparents can see them in their first Sacrament Program, but you leave mine so that there is no way she can be seen.  She still sang her little heart out, but not like she typically had done, and she did a GREAT job with her little speaking part!!  I got to see her, but poor Brady who was towards the back with Kynna couldn't see her at all!!  I guess all you can do now is say, at least there is next year?!!  

Jaylee the hairstylist?

 Saturday September 17,2011

I will never really be able to figure out why my daughter who LOVED her princess hair, decided to play hairstylist and cut it with her preschool scissors!!  It had been a GREAT day so this came as a total shock!!  We were both working on crafts, I was making a new flower headband for her and she was cutting paper.  She using scissors daily almost so it's not a big deal for her.  I had just mentioned to her that she was getting papers all over the floor, so she walked into the kitchen.  I assumed she was still cutting paper over the garbage like she has done many times since she HATES to cleanup when she is finished.  Well a couple minutes later, she comes bouncing out of the kitchen showing off her hair, saying "Look at my hair!!!"  My eyes got huge, and I just said "Oh no!!  Why did you do that?"  I really don't think that she completely realized what cutting her hair meant, because when I told her that we would have to have Aunt Marlee cut it really short to fix it, she began to sob and sob and sob!!  She hasn't cried that hard in who knows how long but she was really upset!!  She kept asking me to glue it back on and then she would say, I want my bouncy hair back!!  So I call my sister-in-law, Marlee and ask if they are going to be home that evening since Jaylee had her first Primary Program the next morning.  Lucky for us they were home so I take her over there around 8pm to get it fixed!!  It was seriously like 7 different lengths, and in the front she has some super short areas and one spot that is cut to the scalp.  Lucky for her and me( I don't know how to do short hair) Marlee was able to cut it a little longer then those smaller areas, and just part it so those spots are covered with some of the longer hair!!  

 This is her just after it happened laying in her bed!!  She locked herself in her room and just cried!!!

 Just before getting in the bath to wash what was left, she did let me snap a few pictures of what she had done!!

 The side look!!

 At Aunt Marlee's getting it fixed!!  She did not want anyone to talk to her about what she had done, and she didn't want anyone to see it.  I did get her to come in, but she would act like she was super tired or sleeping when someone tried to talk to her about it!!

 The new Jaylee hairdo

 For Church I flipped the ends up and put in a headband.  It was super quick and it really did look cute!!  

  She misses her long hair, and when drawing pictures of herself, she draws her long hair.  She tells me that she liked that the new haircut didn't take very long to do, but she wished she hadn't cut her long princess hair.  It was down to her bottom, but this new hairdo will be a nice change!!  And it will grow back fast!!!

Tenley and Jaylee

We had Tenley over playing one day, but of course it was Thursday and we had a few errands to run!!  One of which being our car needing to have the oil changed, so we were out in Bountiful.  There is a McDonald's right across from the place that was doing the oil, so we let the girls go play in their playland!!  It was so much fun to hear these 2 squealing in delight as they played!!  We tried to steal Harper as well, but she had to go somewhere while her mommy went to a meeting!!  Next time!!!  Jaylee is so lucky to have cousins her age!!  I didn't have any close to my age at all, so I kind of missed out on this adventure!!!

Thanks for playing Tenley!!!